TEACHER ARRESTED IN NEW YORK -
A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, the Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'.
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, 'If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.'
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.
It is believed that the Nobel Prize for Physics will follow---
A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, the Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'.
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, 'If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.'
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.
It is believed that the Nobel Prize for Physics will follow---
OK...
Now President Obama, stop being the butt of these kind of jokes and do what the constitution allows you to do which is "PROTECT THE AMERICAN PUBLIC"...
We are at war you moron, stop denying it and act to protect us, not the enemy...
Great Post! You had me LMAO!! Obama is worrying about terrorist rights more than the safety of Americans and America. He is a disgrace to the Office of President and despicable as Commander-in-Chief.
ReplyDeleteThanks Teresa, that came from my dear friend Linda, she is always forwarding me great emails... If she keeps it up I'll have to list her as a contributing editor...
ReplyDeleteThat was so funny Born Again! At first I thought it was true, because with these nuts, you never know. Obummer is a disgrace and putting us all at risk every day.
ReplyDeleteLOL as I started to read that I believed it. That was great. Would not surprise me.
ReplyDeletelove it, still laughing...keep em coming
ReplyDeleteROF-LOL!!!I may just 'swipe' this!
ReplyDeleteFound your site via TOTUS --via MK....
I have been spreading the word RE: A. West for while...thanks for posting his recent comments --I had not read them....
Carol-CS
Thought I had left a comment on this post last night, but guess it failed to take. This is absolutely great and the Al-Gebra was just too much. I love this satire!
ReplyDeleteI'm a man of few words.....HILARIUS!! I may not be able to spell though.
ReplyDeleteLOL! Couldn't resist - cross posted at ARRA News Service with link back to your blog. Thanks for the comment and following our blog. Have returned the favor and please help yourself to anything anytime and link back to our site.
ReplyDeleteIf I can ever be of assistance, my email is posted on the top of the site.